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Love Lost​/​Love Yourself

by My Apologies

supported by
Bronson Burner
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Bronson Burner Shit is awesome..reminds me of the old This Day Forward,old MewithoutYou,YoungWidows,The Used first record,Unwound,etc..still gotta finish the record,but I don't just drop everything and buy a record that quick..shit is good man.. maybe we will get to play together sometime soon.. www.Facebook.com/droll7
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1.
Somewhere in this mind of mine, There is something I cant find. Some call it hope, And some call it happiness. All those who've never felt a thing, No empathy or joy, Or jealousy. No hate and no love, Just dull, moments that don't mean anything. And hidden in it all there are memories of happiness and pain, Of all the beautiful things that make it all worth while Who am I, I'm so broken and lost And In need of direction, But nobody can help me, Nobody will help me, I won't let them, I can't let them. It goes on so endlessly. Now is it loneliness, or just my vanity? I don't know but it all seems so real to me. Everybody's too busy to notice, Too busy to care. And I scare myself with suicide; Asphyxiate the pain and all my dreams Everything will be alright in the end. I'll be buried alone in the end. We'll all be buried alone.
2.
A Longing 02:22
If you see things my way, Feel everything my way, Then you could understand the patterns of my heartbeat, How I lost all hope, Recollected it, Then gave up on myself. I think you'll realize that I'm not really as strong as I seem, If you could see everything the way I see, Our views so differently. My friends and family are few and far between, I don't know who they are, And they don't know me. Now I feel nothing at all, This life is so repetitive. But don't you worry about me, That's not the point of this, I guess I have a lot things to get off of my chest. I just want someone to listen, Anybody to care, I just want to matter to somebody. I want somebody who matters to me.
3.
The shock sets in Standing in front of me, The man who broke our family. Behind the wheel, With a needle in his arm, He crashed into my father, It killed him in an instant, I never got a chance to say goodbye... The shock sets in That man now close to me died ever so suddenly. Gave his life for a life, Saved a life from drowning. Such a bittersweet escape from the pain. He turned his life around the day he told me everything. He told me of the army, How he woke up screaming every night, How he turned to drugs and alcohol to numb all the memories. He wanted to forget, But I will remember forever. That man in the courthouse. With tears in his eyes. That man in the courthouse He looked so defeated His soul left the same time my father died.
4.
I damned myself with all the thoughts in my head, And all the people that I pushed away. Now nobody cares And it's all my fault. And now I care But it's too late. All these secrets that I've kept to myself, I have to lock them all away But I can't hold them down for any longer. So many years past, Knowing nothing will change, No matter what I try. After all the years I lied to myself And everyone around us. I know there isn't a way to live alone. The truth is i have no one to blame but myself, I was always too nervous, uncomfortable. I still am, And I am terrified that I'll never change. so tired of loneliness, and afraid of abandonment, But it doesn't matter because I abandon everyone and everything, And I'm so sorry. I hate myself, I hate myself, I hate all the mistakes I made, And I hate that I never change. I hate myself, Everyone hates me too. I hate myself.
5.

credits

released October 14, 2014

Thanks to Sam Hunt for producing this EP for us! Thank you to Maddie Montoya for creating the artwork as well!

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My Apologies Dallas, Texas

Experimental screamo/post-hardcore band from Dallas, Texas. Check out our newest EP Dark Half.

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